It’s like in the movies when your subconscious brings you to the strangest place on earth then you wake up with a hypnic jerk and you have no idea how you got there. Every time I find myself hanging almost perpendicular to the 25 feet rappelling tower, I hear a voice inside my head asking me “Ba’t ba ako andito?” (Why am I here?) and “Ba’t ko ba ‘to ginagawa?” (Why am I doing this?) I look down then my heart starts to beat fast. I feel that gravity is pulling me harder to the ground. I don’t have a fear of heights but I do have trust issues especially when the only thing that’s holding me from falling is a rope which god knows if it’s securely knotted to the pole! And I’m fond of making up my own Final Destination scene like the tower, which was built way back in 1997 if I’m not mistaken, will collapse along with me or that the rope will snap at any moment. I’m weird that way.
It’s like an irony. Before you could save yourself from the most tragic thing that could happen, you die trying to know how to survive from that rare incident. Sadly, you still fail to escape death.
Anyhow, I will not let fear take over. I am not a quitter. And I’ll look forward to the day when rappelling will come in handy and I’ll be able to save my life and rescue other people. ;) Haha a big NO, I wish that day never comes. And let’s see if getting my shoes dirty is actually worth it.